The Retreat at Oxbow North

July 2022

Debbie, Gary & Terri

Our experience at The Retreat at Oxbow (2012 – 2022): We placed our parents at Oxbow on Albuquerque’s westside following a stroke that left our mother hemiplegic. My father was only on the cusp of needing any assistance whatsoever, but he was determined to live with his wife of 63 years. She died in 2017, and by that time our father needed care. He remained mobile with the aid of a walker, but he suffered from dementia and his eyesight and hearing were very compromised. The owners at Oxbow were eager to market their facility in 2013 promising organic meals, happy residents, oven fresh cookies, and a bright and cheery environment. Oxbow was a new venture at that time. The owners lived nearby. 1. The first few years our parents were there were okay, but Oxbow never provided boutique services as advertised and promised. a. There was never an on-site barbershop. b. The owners were eager to have us worry about holiday meals despite advertising otherwise—that Oxbow would be suited for seniors without local family support. c. Transportation and simple errands were most often placed on the families to coordinate. d. The beautiful patio outdoors was converted into a fourth bedroom, leaving very little space outdoors for residents to enjoy and changing staff responsibilities. e. Only one long-time employee truly baked and cooked meals. She was great and essential. 2. Things changed drastically when the owners elected to open a second residential facility consisting of 8 beds in downtown Albuquerque, Sugar Hollow. That second venture changed the owners’ presence and concern significantly. a. The outdoor furniture was seldom cleaned unless requested by visiting families. b. The planters were empty of flowers. c. The kitchen was frequently dirty on weekends. d. Dog poop was left too long in the back yard. e. Our father was served frozen food from Costco on weekends, including high sodium foods such as hot dogs and pot pies. f. Our parents’ photos were posted on social media without our permission and remain posted despite requests to remove the photos. g. The private bathroom was frequently dirty on weekends; soiled underwear was left by the commode. 3. The care became progressively worse through the years, but we found our father by then was trapped by a combination of his long residence, coupled with his deepening dementia. Moving him was an impossibility. a. Our father’s wallet was stolen. It was found weeks later buried between the mattresses of his bed with cash missing. No formal investigation was conducted. The owners had minimized the stolen wallet and said that it “went missing.” b. Our father’s cell phone was stolen from his room. c. Minimal assistance was provided on weekends. d. We were forced to hire a contract nurse to be with our father on weekends because he feared one of the Oxbow caregivers. The owners refused our request to have that employee removed from our father’s care to their other facility. e. We witnessed the weekend caregiver on FaceTime many times, and without a face mask in the middle of the pandemic. f. We enlisted the help of a social worker. g. The owners told us not to report hospice-related concerns to our father’s hospice Doctor. h. During the last weeks of our father’s life, we weren’t greeted by any of the staff when we visited on weekends. i. Approximately six weeks before our father died, the owners suggested that we should find a new residence for him. j. Only two hours after our father died, one of the owners called to tell us she was “securing” the belongings and that we needed to clear out the room “in the next few days.” This was a passive aggressive way of saying to clear the room immediately in order that they could find another resident to pay over $13,000 per month. We never received a sympathy card or message extending condolences. We are grateful to the one long-term employee who provided exemplary care; however, we deeply regret our decision to place our parents at The Retreat at Oxbow. The Gordon Family